‘You are something beyond your positive and negative qualities’
July 26, 2009
Questions & Answers
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Can I practice silence and meditation by myself at home? For how many days?
Sri Sri: Yes, you can practice meditation. Silence might be difficult at home. Keep as much silence as you can, but there is no need really. You come here (ashram) and practice silence. Once in a while, you can do it for one day. You can say: ‘Ok, I will be in silence for one day per month’. Unless there is such a congenial atmosphere at home, it is not possible and then people will also get confused and will wonder what has happened to you.
When I am so stressed, how can I get it out of my system?
Sri Sri: When you are so stressed, you begin thinking: ‘Oh, I want to get this stress out of the system.’ This hurry in getting it out becomes an even bigger stress. It doesn’t go. You know, when you are stressed, just embrace the stress and relax.
How can I get rid of my fear of failing? I can’t engage or start some project because of my fear of failure. How can I help myself? Thank you for all that you have done for me.
Sri Sri: Accept: ‘Ok, I am going to fail. So what? I still want to do it.’ It's like a game you play, whether you win or lose, you play the game. Correct? If you are playing soccer, you just play, no matter if you win or lose, you just play. In the same way, don’t be afraid of failure. If you fail, never mind, still do it. Ok? You need to take some risks in life.
I want to love and accept myself but it seems difficult. Please, maybe you could really advise me on how to get through it. Thank you.
Sri Sri: My dear, you are love, don’t try to love yourself. Don’t say: ‘I want to love myself; I want to love myself…’
There is a movement here in the Europe. They get up at 3 o’clock in the morning, sit on their beds, look into the mirror and for two hours keep repeating: ‘I love myself, I love myself…’ A couple from this movement was in Switzerland at the same time that we had a course. A couple from our Art of Living course met them in a coffee shop. So, both couples started talking and shared about what they do. So, our Art of Living couple said: ‘You know, we simply love ourselves.’ The wife of that gentleman that does the process every morning said: ‘No, we get up at 3 am and for two hours we repeat: ‘I love myself; I love myself.’ So, the Art of Living couple said: ‘Why don’t you just do our course? It will make a difference.’ So they did the course and afterwards the wife said: ‘Oh, it is such a relief. Now, my husband doesn’t have to get up in the morning, and sit on the bed.’ She would get a headache while he kept doing this practice. She had become miserable. Finally, their relationship was at the edge of breaking. After the Art of Living course, they are now a happy couple.
You are love. Forget about loving yourself. You, anyways, love yourself. There is no need for you to go on repeating it. You should take certain things for granted. Like if you say: I am in Germany. You know you are, you don’t have to repeat it to yourself.
How do I know I am in Germany? And someone comes and tells you to repeat every day: ‘Oh, I am in Germany; I am in Germany…’ If you keep reminding yourself, then you would be taken to a mental hospital. You know that you are in Germany. Similarly, take it for granted that you love yourself. You love positive or negative qualities, however you are. You are beyond the qualities, you are not your positive or your negative qualities, you are something beyond both of them. When you acknowledge this, just know that this is it. Some people say: ‘Oh, I don’t look beautiful.’ Who cares whether you look beautiful or not? Why are you bothered so much?
My wish and will for my spiritual growth is not consistent. Sometimes it is not very strong? How to be more aware of myself; how to see more and stop the chattering in my head for longer periods?
Sri Sri: Just drop this more. I want to be more; I want to be more… Relax. Love for growth in the field of spirituality and mind is deep relaxation. All positive qualities are already within you. When you go deep in meditation, they unfold naturally. We can’t say: ‘I want this flower to blossom quickly. What do I do? Should I open the petal?’
If I want the flower to blossom, just allow, let it be. Pour some water; in time it will blossom.
How can we make a change in the economic system when the capital and big corporations control the world today?
Sri Sri: You think about it, let me also think about it. One thing is for sure, make people more human. When people become more human, business develops the human touch. When greed disappears from the field of economy and business, a better system will definitely evolve.
Guruji, many times after satsang I find it difficult to sleep. Is there something that can help me to sleep?
Sri Sri: Yes, sometimes, the energy is high so you find it difficult to sleep. Tonight, try a cup of milk, maybe. Don’t drink tea before going to bed. Do you fall asleep in satsang? Find that out.
I am a vegetarian, can I take non-vegetarian medicines?
Sri Sri: What you are asking me is about the gelatin capsule. It is ok. Vegetarian capsule is preferable. At times, if the medicine is non-vegetarian, it’s ok. Don’t make a big fuss about it. If it is not available, then it is ok.
I know you are talking about desires in the Part 2 course but still I don’t understand how one can move away from thoughts about something that you really want. If you force yourself to forget it, it comes strongly. If you allow the desire sometimes, it wins you. And what comes instead of the desire, if it flows away? Thank you.
Sri Sri: Just by thinking a lot, you are not going to achieve what you want. Suppose, you want something - you want to go to Munich and the whole night you are repeating: I want to go to Munich; I want to go to Munich… You will lose your sleep. Or when you are driving to Munich from Frankfurt and saying: Oh, I want to go to Munich…You will end up somewhere else, you will lose the way. Just by repeating, the desire is not going to be fulfilled. You need to let it go. Letting going is the art. And that is very, very important. That is what the meditation is about.
I want to ask about beliefs and doubts.
Sri Sri: Doubts are good to have. You should have a doubt: no doubt! Yet if doubt enters your heart and remains in your nature, it is a disease. It is called paranoia. If you doubt everything, including yourself, that is called lack of self confidence. If you doubt everyone around you, that is called paranoia. If you don’t doubt the existence of a natural or Divine power or some higher consciousness and Self, then you are called an atheist. So, an atheist doesn’t have doubts about the supernatural, he thinks there is nothing beyond what he knows. Nor, does he have any faith.
People with paranoia don’t believe anybody and they don’t trust themselves. That is another mental illness. So, a little bit of doubt is good, but if doubt becomes your nature, you will have neither success in the world, nor in spirituality. The whole world is on some degree of trust. Isn’t it? You keep the money in the bank, you trust the bank. And the electricity board gives you electricity, trusting that you are going to pay the bill. The telephone board gives you a telephone connection, trusting that you will pay the phone bill at the end of the month. If nobody trusts anybody, how will any business happen in the planet? Can it happen?
When you want to buy a house, you give the money to the seller even before buying the house. He takes the money and then gives you the house. If you tell him: ‘You first give me the house, only then will I give you the money’, he will say: ‘You first give the money, then I will give you the house. If you both say: ‘I don’t trust you’, then no transaction will happen. Right? So, you know this person is going to give you a house, then you give him the money. And he knows you are going to pay the money, so he gives you the keys of the house.
The whole world runs on mutual trust. Isn’t it? And all your activity happens with self confidence, the trust in yourself. So, I would say, just know yourself. Nobody says: I don’t believe what I am saying. If I say: I don’t believe in anything’, at least I believe in that I say. I believe in myself saying that ‘I don’t believe in anything.’ Who is this ‘I’ that you believe? Know that I. That is what spirituality is.
I pick up garbage for Seva and I see we produce a lot of garbage every day. We are throwing away society. What can we do in our everyday life to diminish the amount of garbage? We want to take care for the environment, for our planet, for our future generations.
Sri Sri: Yes, less waste is better. If you see the forest, you will realize that all the animals leave the forest very clean. There is an ecological balance. There is never a disaster in the forest. They keep the forest clean. You don’t find dead bodies of animals everywhere in the forest. Right? Nature takes care of them so well.
Similarly, we should also adopt more organic methods. All the organic dispose should be more organically composted. So, such garbage, which can be put in the compost, is not the problem. Our problem is plastic, which must go to recycling units.
I am so lazy that I always have a lot of things to complete. I never take the remote control in my hands. It’s never like how it should be. I am happy, but everything around me makes me lonely. When am I going to be fulfilled?
Sri Sri: I think you think a lot. Just sing, dance, meditate with your 100 percent. Anything that you do, put in your 100 percent. I will tell you a story.
Once, some tourists stayed at a motel in a village. When they were leaving, several from the group found that their things were missing. They complained to the village head who confidently declared that the thief was someone from the group of guests. “It’s not someone from the village,” he said.
A gentleman who lost everything, except the dress that he was wearing said: How can you be so sure? The village head replied: ‘If it were someone from our village, they would have taken the pants that you are wearing as well. You see, they do everything 100 percent. If they steal, they steal everything.’
So, when we do everything 100 percent, we feel satisfaction. Otherwise, if are a little bit here, a little bit there, we are definitely looking for something. So sing, dance, meditate. Ok?