30-June-2012-QA1

Guruji, sometimes, dealing with kids gets so tricky that I tend to lose my patience. Everyday I decide to be calm, but when the situation arises I am not able to control myself. What should I do?
Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: You can’t do anything about it now, you have to live life spontaneously. Do you see what I am saying? It is okay to sometimes lose your temper, never mind. You should leave a little room for imperfection in life, and start accepting.
What did you learn in the Part 1 Course? Accept people and situations as they are. It is a lifetime process. Every day you get reminded of this. When these situations come to you, you get reminded, ’Yes, I have to do this, this and this.’
So this is the direction in which we go. Sometimes you slip here and there, never mind, keep moving. Definitely one day, you will achieve perfection.
The other day, one teacher who has been in The Art of Living for around 20 years said to me, ‘Guruji, sometimes it feels so strange that I am happy all the time. Come what may I am happy’.
And I said, ‘Finally!’
20 years is not too much time, it is okay. But you don’t need to take 20 years. Turn back and see the growth in you; this is why these celebrations are done. What is the purpose of Guru Purnima? Once in a year, you turn back and see where you were and how much you have progressed. How you respond differently to situations now and how your reactions have reduced and responses have increased.
So, life is a continuous process. Isn’t it so?
How many of you feel that a lot of transformation has already happened? (Many raise their hands). No one can say that nothing has happened. No one can say, ‘I have not transformed. There is not an iota of change in me.’
If someone says that you should salute them because they are born enlightened.
Some kids are there to teach you a lot of lessons. And it is okay for mothers and fathers to sometimes get upset with their kids. You don’t have to bring them up with all rosy, rosy, nicey, nicey and sweet words all the time. Then you will make them very weak.
I have seen parents who have never scolded their children. These children when they grow old, they can’t stand any criticism. A little criticism, a little disrespect from someone or a little bit of failure rattles them. They become so upset because they never experienced anything like that at home.
So at home, being upset with kids sometimes (not all the time), is like giving them a vaccination so they get stronger to the world outside home. But don’t take this as an excuse to all the time get upset with the kids, it does not work. Too much of it is also bad. If you are scolding your children every day on a routine basis, they become so thick skinned and they go all the way to the other side, which is also not good. A little dose here and there is okay.