18 July 2014 - QA 1

Dearest Gurudev, it is possible to restore trust in a relationship after a partner cheats? How to get past a cheating partner?
Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:

I can tell you one thing, suppose you were in your partner’s place and you made a mistake; not willingly but unknowingly, or due to some compulsion. If your partner does not forgive you and holds it against you, how would you feel?
Get into your partners place and see. If you were the person who made that mistake, and your partner is not forgiving you, would you feel okay, or would you beg your partner to give you one more chance? This is good enough for you to take a clue.

You expect your partner to be an enlightened person. You expect him to behave in an enlightened way. This is expecting too much from your side. If they have made a mistake once or twice, you should forgive them and give them another chance. This is why spiritual knowledge and the spiritual path is so essential for someone to grow in integrity and in honesty. Without this there cannot be honesty.
If they have made a mistake, your bigness is in forgiving them, you should not make someone feel guilty all the time. If they have done some mistake, you should say, ‘Never mind, forget it! Let us move on'. But we don't do that, instead what do we do? We walk with a finger pointed towards them, which says, ‘You did it!’ Then how can they be friendly with you?

Nobody wants to cheats anyone, it is a temptation or a craving for something more that drives a person to do unethical things. Your soul does not stop until it finds itself, until it finds the ocean of joy. Until then, it keeps going for something more, thinking, ‘I may get something here’. This is what drives a person.