Q&A18

How can I overcome anger and resentment?

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:

Don’t try to overcome both. Tackle them one by one. I say, stop the resentment and agree to be angry. Anger and resentment have a chain reaction – you get angry and then you resent; resentment will then turn to anger. Either you are angry with somebody or you are angry with yourself. You are angry with yourself and this causes anger towards somebody else. You may be angry with somebody else but then, as soon as your anger fades, you resent yourself and feel, “How could I lose my temper like that?” So, first decide to be just angry. It does not matter. Just get rid of resentment. This is the first step you can take. Anger is part of your life. As a child you would get very angry. Look at a small child who is holding a toy; just take the toy away from him and see his reaction. His whole body shakes and he gets angry. He yells and shouts, but he is normal the next instant. It doesn’t take a child very long to do this. You get angry but the next moment bring the smile back to your face. Don’t resent. Laugh at your own anger – “Oh, I had a big blow-up today! It was fantastic. It is such fun to watch others’ faces when I get angry! How they reacted to my anger! How soon they caught on to it!” You will soon see that the anger in you turns into alertness; into awareness. That is where pranayama and kriya will come to your aid over a period of time. The resentment had stopped earlier, now the anger will gradually disappear.