31 July 2013 - QA 2

Do you think that the majority of our problems come from our relationship with our parents as the psychologists think?

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:

No, major problems come because of your own mind. Don’t cling that onto the parents, poor things.

Few years back, a young girl came to me with her parents. The girl was past her teenage, around 21-22 years old, and she had such a good relationship with her parents. Then the psychologists spoke to her that so and so problem is because of your parents, and suddenly their whole relationship fell apart. They never had any problem before.
You know, I tell you, when children see so many of these programs on the television, they start identifying themselves with the victims. There are child abuse victims, and the kids watch the television and suddenly start thinking, 'You know when I was 2 years old, my father molested me'.
Her father said, ‘I swear I would never ever do such a thing, but my kid is accusing me of having molested her'.
They were so devastated. Both parents went through hell but they never said a thing. The child had started imagining.

How can a two year old child remember anything? Can you remember as a two year old when somebody cradled you, when they put you down. If they continue from two years to four or five years, then yes, you can remember. But if someone did anything to a two year old, do you think they would remember that? Personally, I don’t think so.
Well, even if something has happened, what is the point of remembering that after 25 years or 30 years, and accusing someone who is in their late fifties and making their life miserable.
Yes, if you are a victim, definitely you should speak out. But sometimes people are not a victim yet they put themselves as victims. Superimpose a victimhood on oneself; people do this.

This is a big problem. Modern psychology has a lot to learn from ancient wisdom. They shouldn't tell people that there is pain deep inside them. If you go deep inside, there is no pain, there is only bliss. You have never gone deeper inside.