Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
I am not qualified to talk about it, but having observed many couples around the world I can give you some ideas. I will give you three ideas; one suggestion for males, one suggestion for females, and one for both.
First, ladies, my suggestion to them is, never step on the ego of your man. The whole world may call your man as stupid, but you should not say that. Don’t put him in a position where he has to prove his worth to you.
The whole world can call him stupid, but you should always say that he is the most intelligent person.
You can tell him, ‘The world does not know, you have a lot of intelligence. Just because you don’t use it, it does not mean that you don’t have it!’
Always pump his ego to enhance his self-confidence, and self-esteem.
A man has to prove himself in the world, when he comes home to rest, to find peace, you should also not put him in a position where he has to prove himself. Always pump the ego of a man and you will have no trouble.
Now, one advice for men; a man should not step on the emotions of a woman. She may complain to you about her brother, her sister, her father, her mother; but if you complain about her family, she will change sides. Isn’t it so? This is how it works in India and America; the same thing must be working in France also, yes? Whatever is dear to the lady, the emotional quotient, should be nurtured. Suppose she wants to go for shopping, don’t stop her.
One advice for both; do not ask someone to prove their love for you. When you are living as a couple for a long time, a little later, the expression of love becomes a little less. Don’t keep on asking them again and again, ‘Do you really love me?’ Or keep on complaining, ‘You don’t love me these days!’ Suppose someone doubts your love for them, it becomes such a big burden for you to prove to your love to them, right? Similarly, don’t expect others to prove their love for you. If you find that their love is becoming less, instead of accusing them saying, ‘You don’t love me, you don’t do this!’ You should ask them ‘Why do you love me so much?’ Stop complaining. In a relationship, complaining does not give any good results at all; it will pull down the energy. Remember, your job is to push the energy up; correct?
Let us take charge of our state of mind. 'I am responsible for my happiness, nobody else!' Then I am in the driving seat. There may be a thousand reasons to feel down and depressed, but we have to move with this one conviction, ‘I am not going to let the world around me bury me as long as I am alive!’ This is the spirit, and this is spirituality! And for this, I am with you, I am committed for you to rise up like bubbling joy, bubbling enthusiasm.
We have a number of programs where we can spend some time together. I tell you, for sure, you will blossom into such a beautiful strong personality that everyone will love you.