Krishna tells Arjuna, "You are very dear to me." Then Krishna tells Arjuna he must surrender. Surrender begins with an assumption. First you must assume. You assume you are the most beloved of the Divine, and then surrender happens.
Surrender is not an action; it is an assumption. Non-surrender is ignorance. Non-surrender is an illusion. So surrender is an assumption. Surrender has to begin as an assumption and then it reveals itself as a reality. Finally, it reveals itself as an illusion. An illusion because there is no two, no duality. There is no independent existence of anyone. An individual has no independent existence. That is it!
Question: Do you have to go through surrender to realize it is an illusion?
Answer: Yes, absolutely.
Question: Where is choice then?
Answer: Choice is your destiny.
Krishna doesn't tell Arjuna in the beginning that he must surrender. First he says, "You are so dear to me." And then he tells him, " There is no other choice for you, you must surrender. Either you do it now, or you do it later." This is the path of love.