Spirituality Is An Appointment With Yourself

04/29/2012

Norway

See one thing I want to tell you, don’t judge yourself too much.

We have this tendency, we judge our self too much, or we judge others.

Either you start blaming yourself, or you blame somebody else. Either you find you are not right, or you find someone else is not okay. You should wake up and stop judging.

Don’t be too hard on yourself. You are part of a phenomenon that is happening. Like there are trees, there are rivers, there are birds; like that you also are here.

So many birds are born, so many birds are dying. Isn’t it? So many trees are coming up and they all vanish. Like this, so many people, so many bodies have come and they will all vanish. And then new people will come and they will vanish.

This planet has been there for billions of years. See your life from a bigger context then you will stop blaming yourself. The first rule on the spiritual path is to stop blaming yourself, because whom so ever you blame, do you like to be with them? Do you like to be with someone you are unhappy with? No! So, if you blame yourself, you can’t be with yourself.

The first rule on the spiritual path is to stop blaming yourself. That does not mean that you justify all the mistakes you do. It is not to justify your mistake but recognize your mistake and at the same time, not blame yourself.

Spirituality is an appointment with yourself.

If you keep blaming yourself, you can never keep an appointment with yourself. So the first law on the spiritual journey or path is to stop blaming yourself.

Now, don’t say, ’Oh! That means now I can blame others.’ No! Every time you have blamed somebody, when you see what you blamed them for, from a broader perspective, you will find that it was wrong and it was futile.

Now, when you found that your judgments were wrong, then very quickly you can start blaming yourself.

So, why I say don’t blame others is because if you blame others, it is going to re-bounce on you. You should not blame anybody.

I have not said one bad word to anybody all these 56 years. The worst that has come out of my mouth is ‘You stupid.’ Sometimes, when I was angry or upset, all that I said is, ’You stupid’, nothing more than this.

I have never blamed anyone or never said any bad words. It has not come out of me at all. I didn’t do anything to make it happen; it was naturally like that from the very beginning. I could never abuse anybody; verbal abuse or any other abuse.

When you pay attention to this, when you stop using bad words, your words gain the power to bless. And your blessings will work. Do you see what I am saying?

So, stop blaming yourself and stop blaming others. Things are the way they are, just move on and that is it. You know, sometimes people say, ’Oh! This person is a fraud. He is not genuine.’

But one should have some criteria to say, what is genuine and what is fraud. Many times, you don’t even have a criteria to judge somebody, you simply blame somebody, ’Oh! He is a fraud.’ And that’s it, finished.

This is an unconscious tendency that has developed in society to blame others, and to blame oneself and then feel guilty about it. And the spiritual journey is to remove this and reverse it.

It is such a delicate thing.

That does not mean that you justify all the mistakes you do. When you make some mistake, they you say, ‘Oh I am on the spiritual path, I cannot accept my mistake and I cannot blame myself. So whatever I did is right.’ No!

It is such a delicate balance. It is not to justify your mistake but recognize your mistake and at the same time, not blame yourself.

If you don’t accept and recognize your mistakes you will never improve. That’s the end of the story. At the same time, if you recognize your mistake and you feel so guilty, and you keep blaming yourself, then also, it is a hopeless case. So, you need that very delicate balance. Walk on the razor’s edge, neither this side nor that side.

Questions & Answers

Expand all Q & A Collapse all Q & A

Read earlier posts

  • March 28, 2017

    March 28, 2017
  • March 21, 2017

    Guide to Parenting

    March 13, 2017
    • When it comes to children parenting is a sacred responsibility. Here are 10 parenting tips by Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar to help you raise children with well-grounded personalities.
  • FAQs on Parenting

    March 10, 2017
    • From toddlers to teenagers
      Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar provides solutions to the most frequently asked questions by all parents.

    Dealing with Teenagers

    March 9, 2017
    • Teenage is a very tough time for your child and you have to handle him or her very skillfully. Here are 4 simple pointer on how to bridge the gap with your teenager.
  • The Secret Of The Infinity

    March 7, 2017
    • The Story of Lord Nataraja
    • The Chidambaram-rahasyam
    • Awakening from within
    • Cosmic dance of Purusha and Prakriti

    Shiva - The Ultimate Truth

    March 6, 2017
    • Essence behind Nataraja
    • Meaning of Apasmara
    • Darmru that represents infinity
    • Symbolism of Snake on Shiva's neck
  • Getting Over A Broken Heart

    March 2, 2017
    • When a relationship breaks down you get so devastated. At that time it is wisdom that can give you the strength. Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar talks on mending a broken heart.

    How to Deal With Problems In Relationships

    February 28, 2017
    • A relationship should come from a space of contributing and not demanding. Then it will be nurturing. In every relationship come from the attitude that “I am going to be a part of this person and give whatever I can"
  • A happy state of mind

    February 20, 2017
    • The art of surrender
    • The secret of birth
    • How to understand prana?
    • How to know if I am enlightened?

    The Space of Humility

    February 20, 2017
    • Does God punish us?
    • Be humble & grateful
    • Children with special abilities
    • How to stay connected at all times