In our daily lives, there are countless situations that can upset and sadden us, and when that happens, we often feel powerless to change it. These moments return again and again, and each time, we continue to be disappointed.
We long for perfection, which seems unattainable, and this saddens us. We want someone to get something done on time, and when they don’t, we get angry. We want things to go our way, and when they don’t, we get irritated – isn’t that so?
In life, we have at least 101 reasons to feel disheartened. However, it is up to us to keep our enthusiasm alive and not allow disappointment to creep into our minds.
#1 If you notice a flaw in someone else, don’t get angry or criticize. Instead, have the goodwill to help them grow.
There are many talented people in the world who also have their negative sides. If you focus only on their flaws, you’ll miss their talents. When you strive for perfection at all costs, you forget your own shortcomings. You want everything to be perfect, but are you perfect yourself? Observe this.
When you attain perfection in something, you stop being impressed by others’ flaws and instead contribute to their growth – you help them become perfect.
Everyone has flaws, just as everyone has good qualities. If you only see the negative, you’ll miss the positives. No one becomes perfect overnight. It’s a gradual process, and we need to encourage and support each other to reach perfection.
#2 Don’t hold on too tightly to problems and don’t be disheartened by them. Know that every problem is temporary.
In the world we live in, there is both pleasure and pain. That’s the nature of life. You’ll always have reasons to feel upset. Sometimes it’s the behavior of a family member or friend. If everything is fine at home, perhaps it’s the neighbors who bother you. If they’re fine too, maybe it’s the dog on the street barking all night. And if there’s really no problem, we still feel dissatisfied. Then we start meddling in others’ lives, trying to fix their problems.
Life is mysterious. That’s why it’s said the world is maya (illusion), and it’s best not to cling to it. Otherwise, we get entangled in situations that fill our minds with negativity.
#3 Keep your mind focused inward – on what you contribute, do, say, think, and feel.
We often get into conflicts with others – this person did this, that person did that. We criticize and distance ourselves from them. When this happens, it means we’ve lost our balance.
The best way to overcome this is to shift our attention inward. Let’s ask ourselves: what is my contribution to the world? What have I done for others? Am I being useful to those around me?
If our thoughts go in this direction, we won’t blame or hurt others. Otherwise, we’ll always blame others and disconnect from them.
#4 If you find yourself complaining – become aware and let go of dissatisfaction.
Channel your energy into something productive. People who complain aren’t productive, and those who work hard have no time to complain – they’re too busy for that.
Those who aren’t diligent or creative constantly find fault in others. They see mistakes in the smallest things. They can’t see the good in others, and this leads to disappointment. We must make sure we don’t let bitterness take root in us. Be active, be productive!
#5 Blame and praise are part of life – don’t let them force you into reactive behavior.
If you live in a society, it’s natural to sometimes be praised and other times blamed. Suppose you work at a company – you can’t expect your boss to always behave the way you want. Do you really expect him to be perfect?
Let’s say your boss likes to mock others and has ridiculed you a few times. You exaggerate the situation and label him a “hopeless case,” and start behaving the same way toward him. The way you react puts you in a reactive mode. You need to adjust your perception and accept that imperfection exists in the world.
#6 Accept people and situations as they are and stay centered.
When we accept that things and people are as they are, we unexpectedly discover signs of awareness awakening within us, and this makes us feel centered and deep. However, this doesn’t mean we shouldn’t point out others’ mistakes or settle for them. No!
While driving to Kanakapura, for example, I noticed garbage on the roadside and asked my secretary to contact the local government. They sent two vans, cleaned it up, and did the job promptly. We should keep taking action, but without getting agitated.
It’s easy to “wash your hands,” sit in a corner and say: “I have nothing to do with this,” and let things continue as before. It’s also easy to despair and complain. The perfect balance lies in taking action without getting bitter or angry.
#7 Consciously choose not to stress and maintain your inner peace.
Often, we get disappointed with others. But sometimes, we also get disappointed with ourselves – we’re dissatisfied with our very essence over small, insignificant things. Achieving self-control is part of yoga – to let things be without allowing despair to creep into our souls. Then our intellect and awareness work better, and we know how to handle different situations.
So don’t stress over people or circumstances, and don’t despair over yourself for repeating the same mistakes. None of that will help. The balance you need to achieve is delicate – to keep your enthusiasm alive without letting disappointment catch up with you. And to react only when and where necessary.
