Lifestyle

10 Ways to Overcome the Fear of Failure and Live Your Best Life Right Now

By Paige Reist | Posted: July 21, 2018

I’m sure you’ve heard the stories: J.K. Rowling was rejected by a dozen publishers before Harry Potter was picked up. Bill Gates was a dropout before he was a billionaire. Oprah was fired from her job as a news anchor before becoming one of the most iconic television hosts of all time. Failure is a part of life, and more importantly, a part of success.

But even with these prime examples, it’s hard to feel like failing is ever really an option. “These are remarkable people”, you might think, “and I’m hardly remarkable. I can’t afford to fail that spectacularly.” But what makes these individuals remarkable is not necessarily that they have some special quality that the rest of us don’t that allowed them to rise above failure; it’s that they persisted beyond these failures. They crawled back up, knocked the dirt off of their knees, and got right back on the ride.

Let’s be honest: getting over your fear of failure doesn’t mean you’ll become a bestselling author, fabulously wealthy, or world-famous. But it does mean that you’ll be able to start living the life that you want. Bravery is that magical ingredient that invites prosperity, happiness, romance, fun, excitement, and fulfillment into your life.

Here are 10 ways to overcome your fear of failure for good:

1. Practice Failing.

The best way to overcome your fear of failure is to, well, fail. The more accustomed you become to failure, even in small, relatively safe doses, the less scary it becomes, and the more you realize that you still retain your skills, qualities, and value as a person, even when you kind of suck at something. Try something completely new--take a painting class, try a new exercise routine, whip up a new and challenging recipe--and you’re sure to get used to a bit of light-hearted failure and realize that it’s not as big of a deal as you previously might have believed.

2. Redefine Failure.

What if you began to think of failure as a good thing? Failure, by far, is one of the most essential catalysts for growth, resiliency, and developing the skill of adaptability. When you fail, it might feel like your life is over, like you’ve squandered your chances of achieving what you want to achieve: you might feel foolish, ashamed, and frustrated. But failure is actually a great indication that you’re learning and growing. It means that you’ve quite possibly taken a risk, and that you’ve definitely learned a bit more about the challenge at hand, the world, and most of all, about yourself. When the next challenge comes your way, you’ll be smarter, stronger, and more flexible.

3. Look at the roots of your fear.

Most of us have a long and complicated relationship to fear and failure. But what, exactly, is at the root of that fear? Failure itself is a universal experience--we all fail now and then, so why do we hold ourselves to the impossible standard of constant, unerring success? Are you trying to prove your worth to someone, or even to yourself? Are you paralyzed by the anticipation of pain or disappointment? Looking at the roots of your fear of failure can help you work through and overcome your inability to take risks.

4. Take it step by step.

Take action towards your goals step by step. You don’t need to achieve everything in one fell swoop! Outline your wildest goals and dreams, and then work backwards to find small, everyday things that you can easily achieve that will contribute to your success. Breaking big tasks down into smaller ones makes them both more manageable and less intimidating, so you’re much more likely to take them on without fear.

5. Nurture your self-worth.

Try to begin to see yourself as your actions, not the outcomes of your actions. The true measure of your character is not how many times you fall, but how many times you rise up after being knocked down. Rather than placing all of your self-worth on the results of your actions, try to begin to recognize the worth of your hard work, perseverance, attitude, and the quality of your work.

6. Become unattached.

When you invest all of your hopes for happiness and fulfilment into the success of a project or endeavour, failure can be one of the scariest things you can imagine. You’ve become attached to something that isn’t even necessarily real. Many meditation disciplines teach that this kind of attachment is the root of all suffering, and that through learning to live in the moment, you can ease that pain. Meditation keeps you present, soothes your nervous system, and gives you mental clarity, along with countless other benefits.

7. Trust in the universe.

There are just some things that you have no control over. No matter how well you’re used to doing and how hard you push, failure is inevitable. Whether or not you have faith in a higher power, it can be incredibly cathartic to leave the big decisions to the powers of design, fate, destiny, or chance. Trust that every door that closes is a door that was not meant for you, and that you are being gently guided onto the path that you were meant to be on. Failure is a part of the journey.

8. Overcome negativity bias.

Human beings have this pesky thing called a negativity bias--our brains are far more sensitive and receptive to negative feelings, thoughts, experiences, and words than they are to positive ones. This can vastly contribute to your fear of failure. Although this bias was likely developed by our ancestors to protect us from everything from predators to committing a social faux pas and losing the support of our community, it doesn’t help us much in the modern world. Overcoming this natural negativity bias can seem like a daunting task, but luckily, Art of Living teaches several tools and techniques both online and in person to help you out.

9. Visualize success.

Make a vision board based on how you want your life to feel. This is a super fun exercise to empower you to chase after your dreams, overcome the fear of failure, and to start to associate taking risks with feeling good. After daydreaming, brainstorming, crafting, and seeing it all come together, it’s hard not to feel motivated to go out and chase the life you want. Good things come to those who go out and get them!

10. Make goals.

Dreams help you take the first few steps, but turning those dreams into goals is what helps you find a motivation more powerful than your fear. Use the S.M.A.R.T. method to outline specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound goals that will help you achieve your dreams, and the chance of failure won’t seem so daunting.

Don’t let fear rule your life! There are so many good things waiting for you, and all you need to do is reach out and grab them.