How do I stay honest when a business partner is dishonest?

What Gurudev says

You know the moment when a business partner acts dishonestly, and you wonder whether you should adapt too, just so you don't end up the fool? Gurudev answers this with a story he tells about a saint who kept trying to rescue a scorpion from the water — even though it stung him every single time.

"Stinging is scorpion's nature, saving is my nature. When it is not leaving its nature why should I leave my nature to save it? I am nothing less than the scorpion. When it is so adamant it won't leave its nature, I will also not leave my nature".

From a talk on the Narada Bhakti Sutras — “Love Knows No Boundaries”, 00:11:52

For Gurudev, this attitude doesn't mean being naive or feeling sorry for yourself. He makes it clear: staying on moral ground doesn't make you a fool — even if it might feel that way in the moment.

You are not a fool if you stick to moral grounds, because those who walk on immoral grounds soon realize they have been fools.

From the official Art of Living website — “Is Politics Dirty?” (Feb 25 2012)

And what do you actually gain from it? Gurudev makes clear: not some visible advantage, but something that shows up quietly on the inside — a peace that can't be bought.

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: Do you want to sleep in peace? Do you want to walk fearlessly? Do you want to live with confidence with your head held high? The happiness that you get from leading an honest life is something you can never get by leading a dishonest life. You may have all the gadgets and luxuries at your disposal, but what is the use if you are not able to sleep in peace.

From the official Art of Living website — “To What Extent Is Idol Worship Acceptable?” (Jun 6 2013)

The common thread in Gurudev's teaching: your integrity doesn't depend on how the other person behaves. It's your own nature, and you don't give it up just because someone else has given up theirs.

What you can do

1. Stay true to your own nature, whatever the other person does. Don't let your business partner's behavior push you into abandoning your own values.
2. Trust that dishonest behavior catches up with itself. Staying on moral ground doesn't make you a fool — Gurudev says those who act dishonestly eventually realize where it leads them.
3. Ask yourself what actually matters to you. Material gains from dishonesty don't outweigh the inner peace that honest dealing gives you.
4. Hold yourself to the same standard you expect from others. Ethics is universal: what you expect from a business partner is the same standard you hold yourself to.

Frequently asked questions

How do I learn to let outside circumstances rattle me less? Gurudev compares a mind that holds on to small praise, blame or insults from others to chewing gum: it keeps the jaw busy without giving any nourishment, and tires you out in the end for nothing. He also shows how easily we lose ourselves in other people's words alone — an "I love you" lifts us up, an "I don't like you" knocks us down, even though nothing but words has actually happened.

How do I deal with unfair treatment at work? To someone who lost a job over unfair treatment by a supervisor, Gurudev advises not to dwell in the past but to move forward with energy, since new opportunities usually turn up. Using the example of losing a position, he also shows that the obvious explanation — "my boss did this" — isn't the real, deeper cause behind it.

How do I handle criticism from my boss without taking it personally? Gurudev compares a mind that holds on to small praise, blame or insults to chewing gum — it keeps you occupied without nourishing you, and tires you out for nothing in the end. A demanding boss and less understanding colleagues can, at the same time, push you to sharpen your communication and bring out talents that would otherwise have stayed hidden.

What is karma, explained simply? Gurudev explains karma through the example of hurt: what happens to us now is nature paying back something we caused earlier — understanding this brings a sense of settledness rather than a feeling of victimhood. Elsewhere he puts it simply: karma means action. Past, present and future deeds each leave, and draw on, impressions that shape what is unfolding right now.

Related questions

• How do I handle criticism from my boss without taking it personally?
• How do I deal with difficult coworkers?
• How do I deal with unfair treatment at work?
• How do I resolve a conflict with my boss?
• How do I find the balance between career success and inner peace?
• Work, Conflict & Business Partners — overview

Sources

The quotes on this page come from:

• Narada Bhakti Sutras — “Love Knows No Boundaries” (BS 16), 00:11:52–00:13:09
• Official Art of Living website — “Is Politics Dirty?” (Feb 25 2012)
• Official Art of Living website — “To What Extent Is Idol Worship Acceptable?” (Jun 6 2013)