Gurudev, you talk about dispassion and equanimity, but when I let go of my defenses, I am becoming more sensitive. How to come out of it?
Read Yoga Vasistha. You have to see that the whole world is just a dream. That will give you the endurance and the strength to withstand unpleasant situations as well. Or listen to Ashtavakra's knowledge.
Keep your intellect above the worldly waters. There will always be turbulences there. When you keep your intellect at a higher plane, then you will act, yet not get so attached to it.