29 December 2012 - QA 5

Dear Gurudev, why does longing hurt so much? I am referring to the longing for the Divine and for the Infinity. Where have we come from?

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:

See, love and hurt are very close and go hand in hand.

When you love someone, then you do get hurt sometimes. It happens this way, and we have to live through it. So do not run away from it.

Getting hurt is a part of love.

Today somebody came and told me, ‘My son is like this, my son is like that; he is not listening to me.'

See, it is only natural. The mother has done so much for the child and when the child does not listen to her at all, she feels so hurt.

Naturally, the mother wants the best for her son, while the son thinks he knows what is good for him. So he does not want to listen to the mother. Now, what do you do in this situation?

The mother came to me and said, ‘Gurudev, what do you suggest I should do?’

I told her, ‘See, I want the best for everybody. So, I want the best for your son and I want the best for you as well.'

To this she replied, ‘But Gurudev, my son listens to you more than me.'

I said, 'Now if he listens to me more than you, then that means he knows for sure that Gurudev has no selfish motives and that I will say the right thing.'

I told the son, ‘You do what you want.'

See, I do not dictate to people, ‘You do this, you do that’.

So hurt is indeed a part of love. The pain is inevitable.

When there is love, it also sometimes brings pain. But to be afraid of pain and to stop loving, and shutting down completely is foolishness, which a lot of people do.

To stop being in love because it hurts at times is not an intelligent decision at all. It is the most foolish thing that one can ever do. But those who sail through that little pinch and move on, will get the real, blissful love.