If love is our true nature then why does it feel so good to hurt the one who has hurt me? How do I stop myself from retaliating?
Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: Do you want the chain to continue? You hurt them, they hurt you, you hurt them and they retaliate again. Do you like to be retaliated against? I am asking you a question. If you have made a mistake unintentionally and the other person starts retaliating because you did something wrong; because whatever you said or did hurt them deeply, and so they want to take revenge, what would be the state of your mind? How would you like it? Why don’t you get into the other person’s shoes and see for a minute? You wouldn’t want that. You would say, "No, I asked forgiveness. I asked to be pardoned". Just imagine if someone refuses to pardon you for things which you did unintentionally, or out of ignorance, would you like it? When you like to be forgiven, how come you don’t want to forgive? And enjoying hurting others is not the right thing. It is simply you wanting attention, that is all. This you need to correct. This is your mind’s sickness. It is the sickness of your own mind to be happy making someone miserable. What do you call it? Sadistic! How can enjoying someone’s suffering make you happy? That type of joy is not for you, no! It appears to be a joy momentarily but it comes back to you a million times more, so don’t go for it. There are better ways of joy. When you forgive, see what big joy, what big comfort it brings to you.When someone comes and apologizes, it is our magnanimity to say, "Okay, never mind". I tell you, our magnanimity is in forgiving, and that is what we do. But if they continue to do wrong, if they don’t respect your forgiveness, then take a stick. Then go, challenge them; go to court or whatever. But you should give ample chances for them to correct themselves.Forgiveness is not a sign of weakness, it should not be taken for granted. At the same time, not forgiving, doesn’t show or speak very well of you.