I was imprisoned for robbery.
During my time in jail, I saw sick children die without medical attention. I witnessed guards beating prisoners, fights, deaths, and even suicides. Seeing all this one can become a different person.
One day, when they came to ask me if I was interested in signing up for a breathing program, I agreed without any hesitation. A program of breathing techniques or any other workshop was all the same to me. All I wanted was to get out of my cell for a while and be with people from outside the prison. When I arrived at the room I saw that everyone was smiling, and I asked myself ‘what are they laughing at?’
Little did I know that I’d soon be on the other side with the realization that happiness needs no reason.
I was born in the Province of Buenos Aires, Argentina. While growing up, I didn’t have my father. He left before I was born. It was just my mom, my grandmother, and aunts who ran the house. As a child, I couldn’t get my daily meals and couldn't have all the toys I longed for. At school, I had good grades, but bad behavior. What I never lacked was the hug and affection of my mom. Unfortunately, as an adolescent, I got into drugs and crime.
Bad company in the neighborhood took me to drugs and crime. But I do not want to justify myself. There are people who were also raised in very hostile environments, and yet they didn’t do what I did. I think that was what I had to live.
During the breathing workshop, it was difficult to tell an inmate ‘I belong to you’ and hug him. I did my first Sudarshan Kriya without paying attention. Just after the third round, I felt that something began to change inside me. Little by little I felt liberated. From then on, I was imprisoned physically, but not mentally. The other prisoners made fun of us, but I could not stop going to these programs.
Three years before my release, Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar visited our prison. He told us that he was sure that after coming out of prison, we were going to be assets to society and lead happy lives. That we were going to be agents of change. I still wonder what made him so sure. We laughed and sang with him, asked him questions about life. All this while, I looked at him mesmerized. I had found my life’s purpose that day. It was to spread joy and peace like him.
I was relieved from my sentence five years ago, having served 14 years. I got a job. I started enjoying my time with my family and rebuilding ties with relatives. A few years ago, I learned that Ismael, The Art of Living instructor who taught us in jail, was conducting a part-2 program in the city of Mar del Plata, about 500 kilometers from my house. This was the advanced meditation program that I dreamt of doing while in prison. I went. I didn’t say anything to him. I didn’t introduce myself until the last day when we had to chat in front of everybody. I talked about where I had done my part-1 programs and Ismael couldn’t believe it. He hadn’t recognized me. He asked why I hadn’t told him earlier.
"It was a silence program," I quipped.
I seem to be realizing the life goal that I found in prison that day every day of my life now. I try to help my friends back in prison by sending them clothes and food and I also volunteer at a children’s home. I am earning a living with farming and I am also learning ontological coaching which is a powerful method to bring change in individuals and groups. Gurudev’s blessing for us to be agents of change is coming true bit by bit. And I can only be grateful for what I have found.
* Carlos Brizuela is a former prisoner and a participant in the World Summit on Countering Violence and Extremism, organized by the International Association for Human Values.
Published in October 2020
